Sometimes you only realise when you stop..

[azekeil]

Sorry I didn't get to the Emergency Judder last night. I would have liked to celebrate too, but I was far too broken at the end of a long and stressful day. The last thing I want to do now is get so run down I get tonsilitus, miss my operation and end up having to go for my operation at the start of my new job... so it was Mr. Sensible for me last night.

I have to say, even in amongst the tiredness and hecticness I re-found what I'd been missing these last few months that I didn't even realise (properly) that I'd been missing. The stress of deciding on leaving and securing the jobs had been my sole focus (with breaks for socialising which I'm sure I'd have gone mad without) for far too long and I didn't realise how much it was taking out of me.

I don't think it's just stopping, either, but the promise of new and exciting work, with colleagues who might actually understand what I'm on about more often than not, with challenges and potential abound that has really allowed me to relax again.

Last night kissycat1000 was able to spend a little bit of time pampering me and I felt wanted, worth something and proud of myself, for the first time in a long time. She too was obviously proud of me as well, and I think that helped. A lot of the joy that should have been there all these past months is back, and hopefully here to stay. I'm sorry, sweetie, that I have been so stressed and unconsolable during this time.

I think I was stuck in a comfortable rut at Intercall, but it was still a rut nonetheless. I didn't feel challenged. There was nowhere for me to go. Ultimately that, combined with the certain knowledge I knew I wasn't being paid what I was worth was enough to make me look elsewhere.

Today has been cathartic, talking to colleagues about my reasons for leaving, including speaking to HR about a job advert for my replacement.

I'm very glad (and smug) that Helen used the words "He's a guru - he'll be very hard to replace" when speaking to HR about me. Also that she was asking me exactly how much I wanted to be paid to stay.

Anyway, time to get on with stuff.

Comments

[easternpromise.livejournal.com]

I didn't feel challenged. There was nowhere for me to go. Ultimately that, combined with the certain knowledge I knew I wasn't being paid what I was worth was enough to make me look elsewhere.

I totally know what you mean on that one. A job that doesn't challenge you is almost the worst thing because there's nothing really wrong with the job, it's just not for you any longer and not many people really understand that. :(

Still, onwards and upwards now! :)

[serena-lesley.livejournal.com]

You have every right to feel smug, that's praise indeed. You've always been Really That Good at all the jobs that I've known you to do, whether you're going in as the 'last ditch effort' person so save a project, a company and a contract, or simply spotting the need for a simple script, knocking one together in 20 minutes and having it save the company thousands of man hours in a short space of time.

You're one of those people that companies don't know they need until they find you, then wonder how theye ever managed without you. You're the guy who appears to know everything about anything, through training, personal experience or simply the ability to use the right phrase in a search engine. You're the guy who doesn't ever believe that things can't be done, only that there isn't an easy or existing way and that with enough effort, skill and intuition, you'll be able to make it happen. With this attidude, not only do you make it happen but you make it look easy.

I'n very proud of you. *Kiss* I love you. :)

[azekeil.livejournal.com]

*kiss*

Sometimes I wonder that you might oversell me, then there are times like this when I know it ;)

[beeby.livejournal.com]

Gosh kissycat1000, u do go on! I think it's really fantastic that an English person is able to express their feelings as you have. Don't mind me, I'm reading "Watching the English" at the moment and we really do seem to be completely up ourselves!

[dennyd.livejournal.com]

she was asking me exactly how much I wanted to be paid to stay.

Y'know, that line of questioning really pisses me off. I've had it myself in the past, and I did on one occasion completely fail to resist the temptation to reply "Well that just points out everything that's wrong with this company's attitude towards its staff. Why don't you try paying people what they're worth before they decide to leave, you arseholes?"

Companies these days have absolutely no interest in treating their staff fairly, let alone rewarding them, and then they look surprised when their staff feel no loyalty. Fuckers.

</rant> :)

[azekeil.livejournal.com]

Uh, yeah. I had a bit of an 'unloading' on the company's new HR person who was.. interested.. to say the least.

Still, I think that attitude, amongst others, was one of the clinchers for my decision. Finally, I was getting an opportunity to work for a company that doesn't appear to have this attitude, and I was going to vote for it with my feet.

And of course let them know exactly why as well.

[serena-lesley.livejournal.com]

Well someone has to sing his praises, since he's far too modest to do it himself. I wonder where he gets that particular trait from..? ;)

[easternpromise.livejournal.com]

I've had it myself in the past, and I did on one occasion completely fail to resist the temptation to reply "Well that just points out everything that's wrong with this company's attitude towards its staff. Why don't you try paying people what they're worth before they decide to leave, you arseholes?"

I would seriously, seriously, seriously love to see someone use that line one day. In fact, it's so good, I may even save it up for future reference...

That's just the evil bitchqueen from the ninth level of hell in me being mischievous though... ;)

[blaadyblah.livejournal.com]

(((((((((((((((((((((azekeil)))))))))))))))))))))

Seeing you happy like this makes me *squeal* :oD

Yay for pampering girlfriends and new job goodness - you've reached out and grabbed what you deserve, too right you're feeling damn pleased with yourself. Now hang on tight to that smug feeling, you're worth every smirk. :o)

[chicaboo25.livejournal.com]

Happy Birthday! I hope you have a good day *hugs*

I am a friend of chocojon