Apres my chat with my Staff Manager
Apr. 23rd, 2003 10:17 amRight, I had the chat with the Staff Manager, told him I was feeling depressed, was unable to do any work from home yesterday. Told him how it was affecting me and that I thought the major cause was the thought of working in Cardiff for the next 6 months on top of all the other work away from Bristol/Cheltenham.
He asked if it was just work that was causing it. I told him I couldn't be sure. He suggested a visit to the doc, which I was half thinking of doing anyway. At any rate now I'm sat here on the verge of tears. I feel out of control of my life at the moment and it's very.. humiliating, apart from anything else.
Anyway, his other advice was to check the job list as he thought the description was for someone with 4 years Oracle experience, which I don't have. I've checked and that might be the case, so I'm going to chase up the guy who offered me the role and see what he's got to say - it's quite possible he is unaware of my current skillset.
Excuse me everyone for writing all this minutae down but it somehow feels good to write it down.
He asked if it was just work that was causing it. I told him I couldn't be sure. He suggested a visit to the doc, which I was half thinking of doing anyway. At any rate now I'm sat here on the verge of tears. I feel out of control of my life at the moment and it's very.. humiliating, apart from anything else.
Anyway, his other advice was to check the job list as he thought the description was for someone with 4 years Oracle experience, which I don't have. I've checked and that might be the case, so I'm going to chase up the guy who offered me the role and see what he's got to say - it's quite possible he is unaware of my current skillset.
Excuse me everyone for writing all this minutae down but it somehow feels good to write it down.
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 02:41 am (UTC)I love you..
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 03:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 02:54 am (UTC)And don't even think about humiliation, no-one is immune to depression and no-one is thinking badly of you because of it.
Sounds like your boss is sympathetic, make use of it. Does your company have any support services for staff welfare you can take advantage of?
In the meantime, keep your lines of communication open - its too easy to shut down and cut yourself off, watch yourself.
Thinking of you.
(((Azekeil)))
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 03:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 02:58 am (UTC)And you know that really there's nothing humiliating about this... a random straw poll of friends and lj associates would probably show more than half of us are feeling or have felt similar. Maybe we should start teasing the people who always seem to be on top of things, for being abnormal! :)
*more hugs*
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 03:04 am (UTC)I'll shut up now..
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 03:10 am (UTC)I've been through this myself and I ignored the signals and ended up getting really ill.
However, it sonds like you've recognised the signals and are acting on them.
Feel free to call me at anytime and we can talk about over the party weekend.
*hugs*
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 03:15 am (UTC)*hugs*
Re:
Date: 2003-04-23 03:22 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 03:34 am (UTC)It sounds like you're doing the right thing, telling your manager about such things and going to see a doctor are positive steps in the right direction. The job market around Bristol seems to be picking up a bit at the moment anyway (although the rates are crap). Keep at it and things will improve
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 04:00 am (UTC)no subject
*big hug*
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 04:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 05:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 08:15 am (UTC)